Tag: parenting

5 baby etiquette rules!

night-baby-eyes-son-76829

 

Babies have high standards when it comes to etiquette. They are an epitome of righteousness, surpassing all levels of mannerism with an A+. If there was anyone who could teach someone manners, that would be a baby. Yes, the same baby that is currently drooling all over your shirt, or farting in your face, or rubbing her poop all over her diaper. They do the right things, with utmost respect for fellow human beings (read parents or others). Below are 5 etiquette rules that you can learn from a baby, or not :

img_3437

 

 

 

Rule #1: Whenever you see someone for the first time, cry loudly so that they think you hate them and want them to go away. For an added value, you can always kick your arms and legs.

*My baby doesn’t do this yet, atleast not with strangers. I didn’t say anything about the rule regarding parents, did I? Sigh!

Rule #2: Once you know that the person carrying you has no intentions of squishing you into a stressball, you can relax and drool all over them. It is your way of showing them that you trust them enough to leak your bodily fluids on their neatly pressed shirt. The cherry on the cake would be if you have just had milk, and spit up on them, reminding them of the time they spent with you till they wash the shirt.

Rule #3: You can show them your million dollar toothless smile and when they are mildly distracted praising your cuteness, you can gently, without their notice, put their finger or fingers into your mouth and bite them hard with the same mouth that was a minute ago producing the million dollar smile.

Rule #4: For people with whom you interact everyday, you can squeal excitedly into their ears so loudly that they instantly become deaf, before they know what hit them.

Rule #5: The best gesture is to poop in your diapers right when they carry you, so that the smell emanates right into their nostrils, making them remember you for a lifetime!

*After all this, if you feel like pulling your hair, don’t worry, just find a baby. She will do that for you, with a wide grin on her face. 

pooja

#FridayFacts : Achievement 

How much is too much?

man-person-people-emotions

By nature, I am a very paranoid person. My husband, on the other hand, is very easy going.

From past few months, I have been taking various pictures of baby girl with varying backgrounds, and have been posting them online (read FB and Instagram). Why do I post them online? Maybe, I want to share them with family and friends, maybe I am showing off my ‘borrowed from Internet’ creativity, or maybe I have the ‘follow the herd’ mentality.  I don’t really know why I post them, though I would like to believe I am sharing her pictures with friends. Another reason might be that baby pictures always bring a smile and might make someone’s day a little brighter after going through mostly negative posts on their timeline. Whatever the reason, I do post a lot of pictures which are restricted to friends. But, a few days after I post the pictures, I turn them all locked, barring it from everyone. Why? I don’t know, I get paranoid.

img_3349-3

My husband asks me why do I post them in the first place and then lock them all? Well, I lock them because I read about pictures getting public, being misused for wrong reasons. As to why I post them, I still have no concrete idea. Maybe, I am a sheep, afterall. Sometimes, I force him to lock the pictures of the baby on his timeline too, but he refuses. His theory is : no one is going to bother. There are zillions of baby pictures online. But, I am still scratching my head over why I post the pictures in the first place knowing how paranoid I am about them being leaked.

Now, coming to this blog, I write about all nasty and frustrating stuff babies do, mostly based on my experiences. But, will my baby feel bad when she reads all of this when she grows up? Will she hate me for posting all this? Will my love for her get overshadowed by the silly, trying to be funny baby posts I write? I have no answer. Should I stop posting them? I am so confused and paranoid!

Baby girl, if you are reading your mom’s blog, let me tell you one thing, I post things only to find and spread humor. I love you like no one’s business and most of the posts are exaggerated versions of what you did as a baby/toddler/teenager/adult. Nothing more. Your mom loves you, and can handle and will handle all your baby, toddler, teenager, adult antics as well as she can.

About the photos, I guess I will continue sharing them with friends, and then locking them all when I get paranoid!

Damn you silly brain of mine! You confuse me.

What do you guys think you would do? Also, does parenting make you more paranoid?

pooja

All original content on these pages is fingerprinted and certified by Digiprove
%d bloggers like this: